And Jane said, "Enough."

The other day, we were doing work in class when a student came up to me to ask some questions, which was normal enough. What was abnormal was that her eyes were red, and she punctuated every sentence with tears. Hmm..very abnormal. Indeed. We came to a point where I was like 'Okay, that's it...need to get to the bottom of this.' So I pulled her out of the class and thought about my questions - tears like those to a girl her age can mean many things - a broken heart (but she looked the down to earth sort of girl who would not dabble in BGR), school stress (but she is an intelligent girl), friendship stress (but she is well-liked by her peers)...so I decided to go for the jugular vein - "Are your parents quarelling?" BINGO. The tears flowed and she was sobbing then...

It never amazes me everytime I heard this from my students. My parents are quarelling. My parents are separating. My parents hate each other. My parents are divorcing - blah, blah, blah... Dear parents, please stop asking your poor children to take sides - they are also humans with feelings, and worst still, if they are older, they are at the age where they feel the pain more. They do. They'll feel betrayed that at the age where they should be feeling the first sweet pangs of crushes and puppy love, you had to bring them down to earth and make them see the ugly side of marital life. Not fair. Not fair indeed. And very selfish. Dear parents, get this - your life, as you have known it - is 'over'. Give your kids a break and let them LIVE. They deserve all the hopes of a better life. You have got yours. It's payback time - help, guide your child to look upon the world with eyes of compassion, with hearts full of hopes to better this world and live theirs to the fullest. You owe that much to them. You're their parents. They see this world because Allah has chosen you to bring them forth. LIVE for them. And if really life is unbearable to be with the significant other - that you'll rather have the physical abuse, the bruises and broken bones, rather than suffer the mental abuse of feeling you're the lousiest of the lousiest, the most idiotic of all idiots -then have the courtesy, rational mind and unselfishness to leave the kids alone - settle your differences like real adults and don't make them choose or feel guilty or worst, feel like they are responsible for the mess you have created. Please. Let them live...really live.

And child, - IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT! It never was. How could it be your fault? So don't bear it too hard on yourselves, alright? Stay focused on your business at hand - which should be to study and get the best results - for that is your future. You deserve it - that bright future. Go for it. And if your parents are not there beside you, then I pray that Allah will give you good friends who will guide you towards goodness, towards being closer to HIM. And dear students, you have the most powerful weapon ever - doa. Prayers. Sholat. If your parents have failed you, if your friends desert you at the most direst times - then please believe that Allah never will. EVER. He is always there by your side - even closer than your jugular vein.

So hold your head high and persevere to do good and be good. And may Allah be with you all the way - which HE will - if you let HIM to... Ameen.

And if anybody should ask me what do i know about marital problems, mental abuse and broken dreams, then I will look them in the eye and give them a classic Patrick Jane's answer:

"Enough."